Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Volunteer for the Bangalore Queer Film Festival 2012!


Volunteer at the BQFF 2012

You can help the Bangalore Queer Film Festival 2012 by volunteering. There are plenty of opportunities and many tasks that need to be done. Contact us as soon as possible after going through the tasks and filling up the application form.

Volunteer Teams and Tasks

Please go through the list of Volunteer Teams that are going to be needed and choose which one you feel interested in and committed to.

Volunteer Application Form

Please fill up the VOLUNTEER APPLICATION FORM and send it by email addressed to Ms. Rohini Malur, here.


Thursday, January 19, 2012

What To Do in Case of Homophobic Abuse

Hey everyone,

After a recent incident of homophobic abuse, in fact it happened on the pride night (i know..how sad and ironic). Emanuel and I wrote up this guide. Let us know if there are any additions that can be made.

Please read it and take something useful from it. Thanks again for all the inspiration!
-----------------------

What To Do in Case of Homophobic Abuse


1. What is Homophobic abuse?
Homophobic abuse can range from name-calling, discriminatory language, taunting, to physical alternations, violence, throwing of objects, and the list goes on. Any kind of willfully discriminatory action towards one or more LGBT persons can be considered homophobic abuse.

2. Where it can happen?
Anywhere. Homophobic abuse can happen in the most gay friendly neighborhood and in the least. Reports of homophobic abuse have been made in areas as public as Church Street and Times Square but can also happen just outside your doorstep, at school, or at work.

While homophobic abuse can happen anywhere it is important to not live your life in fear. Know what to do if you encounter a situation of abuse and empower yourself to stay smart when it happens.

3. What is legal?
Being LGBT is legal in India. Intimidation, blackmailing, and assault are illegal. Know your rights. No one in India can be “caught” for being gay. If someone threatens to reveal your identity or take you to the police it is important for you to call them on their bluff. Tell them that you will gladly go to the police and report them for intimidation, assault, and blackmail. If they do end up bringing you to the police they will be the ones in trouble. Again, being gay is not a crime.

4. What to do if you are in this situation?

If you find yourself in a situation of homophobic abuse, here are some tips:

A. Stay calm
Keep a cool head throughout. This will help you think clearly about what you should and the best steps to take. Staying calm does not mean not reacting or responding, but it is important to not freak out. Abusers pray on fear so, even if you are terrified, don’t give the abuser the satisfaction of knowing it.

B. Be Proud and Be Smart
Proud:
If someone is calling you abusive names, telling you that you are disgusting or perverted, you can choose to ignore them and not give them the time of day or you can ask them why they are filled with so much hate. No matter how you respond, realized that you have a lot of to be proud of and that no one can take that away.

If someone says you are a filthy gay, you might think of saying: “I am gay and proud of it.” Or “ I am proud to be gay – if you have a problem with it, keep it to yourself.”

Smart:
Being smart means knowing how to judge a situation. If the abuser wants to get physical - by pushing you, throwing things at you, or the like - you need to be smart about how you react. If you feel as though you are capable of defending yourself and need to defend yourself than that is one choice of action, but if you are outnumbered, alone, or don’t feel comfortable defending yourself by responding physically then report to the nearest responsible adult and/or safe place immediately. If this is occurring inside a restaurant, bar, or residential area – alert the manager, bar owner, or look for a nearby safety zone immediately. Don’t wait.
Please also see the emergency numbers section just below.

C. Call emergency numbers.
Have these important emergency numbers stored in your phone and on quick dial and make sure to call them immediately when the abuse starts. There is no such thing as being too careful or too responsive to homophobic abuse. The worse that can happen is you get some back up in the case the situation does worsen and a little moral support in case in doesn’t. The people on the other side of these phone lines are there to help. They want to be there and they want to help you.

Even if the incident is over and the abusers have left, you can give these numbers a call to report what happened.

Sangama runs 24/7 crisis hotlines. If you are ever in trouble, call them. They will help you ASAP
+91 994 560 1651 / +91 994 560 1652
+91 994 560 1653 / +91 994 560 1654
+91 994 523 1493
The Alternative Law Forum
+91 80 2286 5757 / +91 80 2286 8757
Good As You/Swabhava
+91 80 2223 0959
Lawyers Collective Bangalore
+91 80 4123 9130 / +91 80 4123 9131

D. Report the incident

One of the biggest obstacles in fighting homophobic abuse is a lack of data. Without enough hard data and statistics it becomes hard to implement policies that will make our cities and our lives safer. Policies such as sensitizing and training police, implementing extra watches around certain problem areas, and even the changing of laws to be stricter when punishing those who commit these crimes, are all potential results of increased reporting.

There are many ways to report an incident anonymously. One can file an anonymous report at a police station, get a friend to do the same, leave an anonymous tip on a police phone line, or send in a letter or email.

In you have chosen to report the incident to the necessary authorities it may also be a good idea to bring up the situation to peer support groups in your area. There are a variety of support groups throughout India that provide safe spaces for LGBT people to talk about incidences of abuse. In Bangalore, the Thursday night Good As You meetings continue to provide a forum for individuals to share their stories, seek solidarity and advise, and inform fellow community members.

While it can be very frightening to report or to talk about incidences of homophobic abuse, this is one of the best ways in which to use your experience as a force for positive change. Our power is that we are in the midst of a worldwide civil rights movement and the world is listening. These issues are being talked about in meeting rooms, offices, and coffeehouses around the globe and incidents such as this add needed real-life examples to that conversation. If everyone kept their experiences a secret it is almost assured that nothing would change – but if we share then we have the ability to empower others and gain perspective ourselves.

5. Some quotes from people

“When I was in my final year in law school…these people…broke into my room and found these books that my boyfriend had gifted me and just kind of tore them up and scribbled…fag on the cover and obviously broke the lock open for that. If you are in an institutional set up than I would say approaching the authorities is a great idea. In other circumstances, anyone who bullies and an anyone who is homophobic does not deserve your time and patience…I would say contact your local NGO person, whoever they may be – they’re always very helpful here. For instance I did talk to people at ALF when that happened and you know, they were of some use to help give me advice for things.” Sundeep

“Two years ago I was stalked by a man instead a car. It was quite late -11 PM. At 11 I went out [and] started walking and I could feel something, you know? It’s creepy. It’s scary. It’s dark outside – no one’s around so there was a neighbor cigarette shop and people there knew me well so I stopped there, I started smoking a cigarette and the car stopped right there. I still had a kilometer to walk. I decided I am not going to look the person in the eyes and I just kept walking and walking walking and I made it to my home.” Saeed

“Another time, back then, in 2004, I had just started meeting people. I met this guy. One morning my mom told me that a friend of you wants to speak to you. I heard a random unfamiliar voice on the phone saying, ‘I heard that you were hot in bed. Meet me tomorrow at 5 PM.’ That you have to come, you have no option. That was hilarious I replied, ‘If I decline what are you gonna do?’ He said ‘I’m going” to speak to your mom and I’m going to tell her what you are doing around in this town.’ I said ‘good luck’ I slammed the phone. Nothing happened.” Saeed

“My BF & I checked into a hotel in Chennai for a night in 2009 (after decriminalization of Homosexuality in India). He lives in Mumbai & had came out to his parents that day (which went disastrously). He rushed to Chennai to be with me. We had to stay in a hotel because I lived with my parents & didn't have enough privacy.


When we checked out the next day, guys at the front desk made some nasty comments (behind us). And also asked persistently why we were staying in a room when we live in Chennai (I had given my address during check-in. They didn't have any problems letting us stay & wanted the business.)

For the next few weeks, I got harassing calls at my residence. The guy who called spoke to whoever picked the phone & said thing like " I am Mohan's wife speaking", "May I speak to Mohan madam" (referring me as a female), "Mohan sir indha vaaram entha hotel, enna rate?" (Which hotel is Mohan staying this week? what is his rate?) etc..

My parents were very upset. I am out to them, so I explained what happened & asked them to ignore the calls. I didn't pursue this with the hotel.” “It took every ounce of my energy and will to write this mail without being overtly emotional though the entire experience was an eruption of emotions. Mohan


Never in million years would anyone of us have thought that our regular weekend pub hopping would end up in such disheartening and humiliating experience. Being able to glide through in and out of the lounges and bars for many years we never would have imagined that something like this will happen to us. Assuming being well educated and being in the cream layers of the society will make things easier for queer men was shattered.

What can be merrier and joyous than being with bunch of gay men who could just see everything on a lighter note??? That was the state of mind we were in when we started out on 23rd October Sunday evening. As we were getting ready we got a call from couple of our friends who were already in a bar (The Zodiac bar at The Accord Metropolitan) to come and join them. Since this is one of the bar we have frequented we went inside and after the usual greetings and hugs couple of us placed the orders and others started looking through the menu One of us was carrying a man bag and the waiter sort of whispered to the bartender pointing him. When our friend asked the bartender about our order he didn’t answer. The manager I presume told him that there is no service for our group and we are not allowed and asked him to leave the bar.

Since he couldn’t talk Tamil and the manager couldn’t respond well in English, we, who were busy going through menu sensed something was wrong as our friend started looking perplexed.

The entire scene unfolded in the lounge outside the bar when we asked why there is no service. One of the service guys said they allow only men and women. We were shocked by this response. It was a blow to our pride and we were completely taken aback.

Incredulous as it sounded one of us asked him again what he is trying to say, he said that “men and women only sir, gays lam allowed illa”. We shot back that there is no such rules listed in entrance and we have every right to be there and they are unreasonable denying service. Then came another guy who started talking in Tamil said “ungala ulla vidradellam asingam. Kelambu kelambu” (it’s a shame for us to let u inside. Move move).

We were addressing him with respect till then and he started addressing us in a disrespectful way, tone and body language.The argument got heated and we asked them if they have any rules against letting gay men in the bar and if so they should put that in sign board and or give it to us in writing stating so. When we were inquiring on the regulations this guy became abusive and told “naalu aalungala kooptu thorathunga ivangala” (Bring four guys and chase them away).
We were so shocked and stunned by the way the management was handling and we demanded we spoke to their higher authority stating that’s they aren’t managing the issue well. He said that “adhellam mudiyaadu. Ungalukku yellarayum kooduvaangala”. (We can’t call authorities and all).

Though I had every intention of making a protest in the lounge we realized that we could do nothing about it and decided to leave the place before things got uglier.
The entire experience was so humiliating, though we all stood up against the discrimination, it dint fail to leave a deep rooted scar. I couldn’t imagine how worse the same would have been if we weren’t a bunch. When I look back at this entire scenario, I realized how feeble legal and social support is towards the queers.

Though we couldn’t do much on the issue, sharing it in this space might make us realize that we don’t have to put up with everything. At the least we could voice our protest.” Manohar


All names mentioned above in the incidents have been changed

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Slutwalk police permission revoked.



https://www.facebook.com/notes/slutwalk-bangalore-the-official-portal/a-note-of-victory/303434233020408

I'm copy-pasting the most important bitsfrom Dhillan Mowli's note below, but you should click the link above to read the whole thing.

I’m home today after a very long and very hard day. Amongst the many emotions that the events of today rile up, a sense of victory stands tall. Today was a day of victory. I met with the Additional Commissioner of Police (Law and Order), Mr. Suneel Kumar, at 3:00 P.M. in the afternoon; he was warm and receptive to the cause and only asked me to ensure that no “untowardly incidents” happen at the march. I gave him my guarantee (obviously enough) and walked out with a sense of nervous anticipation. 

 At 8:15 P.M. we get a call from the Police Commissioner’s office saying that our permission has been revoked. Why? Because of “security concerns” they said. Mr. Suneel Kumar, informed my mum (who has also been helping with organizing) that the BJP, RSS, Ram Sene and other organizations had aggressively protested against the march happening. Many of them had apparently even communicated in the tone of threatening violence if the march went on. And hence, just as we were at the printers getting the last of the banners printed out, SlutWalk Bengaluru was brought to a crude halt.
 ...


 Now let’s visit the issue that SlutWalk actually tackles – Victim Blaming. We were made an example of the very issue we sought to fight. Instead of providing us with the security we needed, the police decided to put the onus on us as the “ones who are attracting trouble”. True there may be “undesirable” elements, true there may be people wanting to cause trouble and true the risks may be many more. But the solution is not to shut down a perfectly legitimate movement that addresses an issue that has landed our country’s reputation at the bottom of the global barrel. The solution is to beef up measures and ensure that such “undesirable elements” do not obstruct a peaceful protest. Don’t punish the victim, punish the criminal. Don’t brand those protesting against Victim Blaming as a “Law & Order threat”. Blame those who think it’s NOT ok to protest against victim blaming.

And for an upcoming superpower” such as ourselves, it is truly pathetic that all we look for is the smuggled tantalism of skimpy clothing in a movement whose true aim is to protest the act of blaming a victim of sexual assault. Burqa, salwar, sari, jeans, shorts, hot pants or a skirt; it doesn’t matter. It never did. The word “Slut” was simply a play on irony, something that is clearly lost on many of our extremists. We had 22,172 reported cases of rape in 2010. That amounts roughly to 1 rape every 34 minutes and 1 case of molestation every 26 minutes. 571 reported rapes of children under the age of 10. The conviction rate is 26.6 %. And this is just for rape, not any other form of sexual abuse. In the face of figures like that, it’s appalling that these “upholders of Indian culture” think they can tell me how to dress and how to behave, when i choose to protest for my right not to be blamed for a sexual crime committed against me. What they have done is not sent us back with our tails between our legs, but instead taken on an underdog that will chew their rancid mentality and spit it out for good.

You know, I went to the first Slutwalk meeting and then decided that I wasn't going to be able to work with them - the people in charge had styles that put my back up. SR went along a little longer, but stopped for much the same reasons - well, worse, because they'd had time to pile up.


Some of us dislike the Slutwalk campaigns because it's sensationalising, because reclamation is never an entirely successful project, and often not at all, because being sex positive needn't mean being publicity positive, because the Slutwalk campaign as it is a structured does not lend itself with ease to class/caste/race solidarity,


But one of the essential principles from the outside remains worth while - we can wear what we like on the streets and still have the right to not be raped. Our clothing is not someone's excuse to hurt us. We don't rape ourselves. Someone else does that, and then pretends that we deserved it, the way someone is sent to jail after being convicted in court for murder/robbery - and yes, rape.

People looked at the methodology of the march, and proved the Slutwalk point - they will blame us, shut us down, pull out the time-exploited phrase "Indian culture", threaten us with physical harm - all to stop us from openly, collectively, powerfully taking responsibility for ourselves, and denying responsibility for the actions of others.


We've just come out of Pride Week - which went off very nearly without a hitch. The police walked with us, talked with us, did crowd and traffic control with us. We spoke to reporters and were on tv, and in the print media. I was speaking to AC about this and she said"it's safer to be gay in this city than a slut" - which basically means it's not safe to be a woman, at all.


Well fuck them. Fuck them all. I'm out tomorrow in high heels and low necklines, 'cos I wanna, and they can't stop me. And if they try, it's on them, and not on me.

<looks for pepper spray and camera>

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Poster/Accessories making, Bangalore Pride 2011


Assemble at the Swabhava office on the 17th of November, 6:30 pm onwards. We're making posters, hats, bands, you name it! All the things we make will be worn on the 27th, during the Pride March. If you're not sure you're up to volunteering for entire events, but want to pitch in anyway, this is a great place for to help out and express yourself at the same time. (This is also a safe zone for people who're not sure about being out in public - you don't have to feel left out!)

If you miss it, don't worry! There will be a second workshop on the 23rd of November, at ALF, from 2 pm to 6 pm. :)

Be there and be queer, people!




Saturday, November 5, 2011

In memory of Famila.


So, the Programme in Memory of Famila is happening on the 6th, this Sunday, at 5 pm. Famila was a woman who did crucial work for queer women - trans, lesbian, bi - in Bangalore. I'm making it a part of the WHaQ! Sunday meeting agenda.

The programme is the official agenda of the WHaQ! meeting. I'll open the office at 4, and stay there till 4:45 - anyone who wants to come but doesn't know the way to 1 Shanti road can come to the office and we'll go together. Others can meet us directly there.

We can do dinner after, for those who don't want to come to Famila's programme but want to meet the WHaQ! group in any case.

Here's the original invite, from the CSMR list:


Dear Friends,

We invite you for this program.

Organised by
Friends of Famila

A PROGRAM IN MEMORY OF FAMILA
Organized by friends of Famila
Famila, a radical feminist, very active in queer politics, a Hijra who questioned all forms of hierarchy and feudalist patriarchal systems within and outside the community, a beautiful person who brought in new visions and aspects to queer politics died in the year 2004 when she was 24 years.
Famila identified herself as a Hijra, sex worker, bisexual and a feminist. She was a board member of Sangama, an organization working for the human rights of sexual minorities, an active member in Vividha, an autonomous collective of marginalized sexualities and genders. She was also working in Sangama as a project coordinator for Hijras and transgenders.  Her everyday life itself was a challenge to the hetero-normative patriarchal society. Many people during her time boasted about communal living but never succeeded. She was a real example for communal living, as there were many people who lived in her house. It was a house of marginalized sexualities and genders. This shows that she not only identified herself as Hijra but also respected and accepted different sexual and gender identities in its real meaning.
Famila was born on 6th November 1980. She was the first person to go against her own community to accommodate all queer identities, especially the female born sexual minorities, in her house providing shelter.
Famila was well known for her clear, straightforward and radical articulation of the struggle of marginalized sexualities and genders in many conferences and programs. She took a lead role in organizing the 2nd Hijra Habba in Bangalore through the autonomous collective Vividha, mobilizing more than 2000 people for the program and collecting funds from public to fight for the rights of marginalized sexualities and genders.
Unfortunately, she passed away in 2004 July, at the age of 24. There has been a huge loss to the work that she planned to do and also that kind of radical politics. For friends of Famila she is not dead and is very much alive for many of us in our memories. A few friends of Famila from last year have started celebrating her birthday in her memory to keep her radical politics alive.
We are organizing a program in memory of Famila on 6th November 2011 at the 1, Shanti Road, Shantinagar, where her friends will share their experiences with her and some footage will be shown about her. People who would like to share their experiences about the interactions with her are most welcome to do so.  
Speakers – A.Revathi, Shakun Mohini and Chandini
Venue – 1, Shanti Road, Shanti Nagar, Bangalore - 560027
Date and Timings – Sunday, 6th November 2011, from 5 PM to 7 PM

Monday, October 24, 2011

WHaQ! Sunday meeting, 24th October, 20011

No cookies for me today, I had assistance with the door.

Six people showed up, including the newbie who could only stay for five minutes. 

A brief summary of what we talked about:

  • The Pride Mela. As always, contact me if you want to volunteer or contribute, or any of the others mentioned in the initial call-out. (Here's the larger Queer Pride list, if you want to do something not-mela related for the Pride.)
  • Famila. Famila was a "a radical feminist, very active in queer politics, a Hijra who questioned all forms of hierarchy and feudalist patriarchal systems within and outside the community, a beautiful person who brought in new visions and aspects to queer politics died in the year 2004 when she was 24 years." The Friends of Famila are organising a program in her memory on the 6th of November at 5 pm. The venue is 1 Shanthi road. The speakers will be A. Revathi, Shakun Mohini and Chandini.(As an aside, read A. Revathi's The Truth About Me. You won't regret it., I promise you.)
  • Dear Bangalorean Queer Woman: Yesterday's meeting makes me wonder if you do in fact need to be told that spankings can be in an incredibly erotic experience. FYI.
  • The media, and how it is weird.
  • Child adoption in India, what we can do, what we can't.
  • why more WHaQ members hadn't shown up to the meeting. :(
  • All the fun that was had at yesterday's sleepover. (If you were there, you know what I'm talking about.)
  • Money for Pride! We should get Siddharth a huge piggy bank to keep on donation tables. We can put Pride stickers on it, or something. Seriously, look at this pig: how could you let him down?


Sangini (India) Trust calls for volunteer counsellors.


Pasting this from the original Facebook post:
"Have you heard of women who love women, biological women who feel that they are actually men, sometimes more sometimes less, lesbian, bisexual, transgender individuals?

Did you know they exist in every culture, occupation, religion, state, socio-economic class, country, marital status, and race?
In fact, wherever you go, you actually meet women who are attracted to women and/or feel they are trapped in the wrong body.

But why can’t you see them? The reason is that we are often silent about ourselves and our feelings and that makes us invisible. So, we become in a way unseen/unheard of. You will think now, fine, I don’t need to tell everyone about my feelings. Perfectly alright!
But there are times when each one of us needs someone to talk: heart-pain, parents want you to get married, you struggle with your family to be allowed to have short hair, you feel lonely, just need to talk to someone in confidence, or simply want to be linked to a larger community.

For times like these, when you have really no one to talk to there have been counselors around. Sangini Counselors have been talking to women attracted to women and transgender individuals since 1997 over phone, face-to-face, email, etc.

Currently Sangini (India) Trust is looking for volunteers who want to become counselors. Sangini was established in 1997 and was the first organization in India to offer Helpline and Community services to women attracted to women, queer, transgender, lesbian, bisexual individuals.

We are looking for YOU:
Are you a woman who feels attracted to women? Have you been born into a female body but feel that’s completely mis-matched with your actual self, you are actually a man?
Want to make a difference?
Do you enjoy listening to people?
Can spare a few days for training. Thereafter 5 to 6 out of the 168 hours every week?
Have been wondering how to get more people to become part of the community?

What you get in return:
•Intensive training on ‘Counseling skills, ethics, and principles’;
•Exposure to other organizations working on LGBT issues;
•Chance to interact and learn from various senior counselors, trainers and activists;
•A chance to help people who really need your help.

Grab this opportunity to support women attracted to women, lesbian/bisexual/transgender individuals and couples move out of shame and towards pride.

Interested? Write to us at sangini97@hotmail.com and tell us a little about yourself and how we can contact you.
Or
Call at 9810671603 (Monday to Friday, 11am to 5pm)
Deadline for signing up as a volunteer: November 3, 2011
Counseling training: November 12 and 13 (weekend)
Location: New Delhi"
About Sangini: click here and here.

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Pride Mela details!

We are excited to announce that the 2nd annual Bengaluru Pride Mela is scheduled for Saturday Nov 26th, 2011.
 We are looking for:

PERFORMANCES
Skits, magic, dance (Bollywood, Tollywood, Kollywood, Hip hop, Classical, Latin American, Contemporary), drama, stand up comedy, poetry, etc.  All performance styles are welcome!
Performances should be under 10 minutes long.  Please email your name / the name of your group, along with a sentence description of the performance to Kareem: kareem.khubchandani@gmail.com.  Submission deadline is Nov 10th. 

STALLS
We welcome NGOs and other LGBT friendly organizations, bookstores, arts and crafts, henna artists, tattoo artists, food and drink vendors, florists, gift vendors etc.
If you are interested in setting up a stall, please contact Rohini: romavenkat@gmail.com for further information.  Submission deadline is the 10th of November.

PICTURES
We are hosting a photography competition as part of the pride celebrations.  LGBTQ oriented photos that fit the theme “IN PUBLIC,” are invited for submission.   Interpretation of the theme is open to the photographer.  The winning photographs will be published in India’s queer magazines: Fun, and Pink Pages.
Please email your submissions to Prithvi: prithvijho@gmail.com.  Submissions should include a high-quality digital photograph, photographer’s name and contact info, and a title or one line description of the photo.  Submission deadline is Nov 10th.

VOLUNTEERS
The mela is a big event and we need help making it run smoothly.  If you would like to help out, please email Krishna: krishnapatil22@gmail.com. 

Please do not hesitate to contact any of us for further information about the Mela!

Krishna, Kumar, Kareem, Rohini, Prithvi, and Sam

Quick and Dirty Update about Pride

Life has been kicking my ASS this last week or more, and I'm finally,  almost, free and back, and missing you girls like crazy.



This is a brief summary of what this year's Queer Pride Bangalore will (mostly) look like:

  • November 19th, Saturday - a fund raising garage sale at ALF
  • November 20th, Sunday - a cricket match? I wasn't at all interested, so I forgot, insensitively, that others might be. Will find out and update you guys.
  • November 22nd, Tuesday - Transgender Day of Remembrance - probably a candlelight vigil at MG statue
  • November 24th, Thursday - Hopefully something at the Swabhava office. Maybe Vinay will run a movie? I'm not sure anyone has actually spoken to him about it, so this might not happen at all, and might just be a little bit like a park bench stories thing, except without the park.
  • November 25th, Friday - a panel discussion, but we're not sure what on just yet.
  • November 26th, Saturday - a Mela, with stalls and performances, hopefully to be held at Ravindra Kalakshetra. And after, we party!*
  • November 27th, Saturday - Pride March. As far as I know we haven't got permission for routes for the march yet, though we do have options.

The next planning meeting is on the 19th, next Wednesday, at ALF.  Probably at 6: 30. Everything is still a bit up in the air. I'm  setting up a WHaQ meeting on Sunday, so those of you who want more detailsshould contact me.

And lastly, venally and importantly: donations, we need them! Look at this adorable pig:


How can you resist that?


*Actually, I daresay there will be parties all over the place, but this one will happen after the Mela, so there!

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

SlutWalk (?) Bangalore planning meeting

No one actually recommends walking in those heels; they do look pretty, though.



So, the Slutwalk. This is where it started: in summation: a Toronto policeman told a safety class that "women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized."

In the world where we live, we take precautions. We do this for reasons of common sense, or fear, or because our personal styles insect with a life of taking precautions. Sometimes, we don't take precautions. We wear what we want, even if someone is going to say, That's provocative - sometimes because we want to be provocative. We drink, we walk the streets after dark, we have jobs and transport and we take advantage of our ability to move about freely. Sometimes, bad things happen - actually, no, let's rephrase that: Sometimes, people do bad things, and they sometimes do those bad things to us. The basic point of the Slutwalk is this: That the police, the public, the media, the society around us, should not use our attire as reasons to hold us responsible for someone else's actions against us, and further they should use use these as reasons to excuse or validate the actions of our assaulters.

To sum up: don't blame the victim. don't excuse the perpetrator. He is not "like that only". Don't police the victims. Police the assaulter.

It is a sad fact that in a world that is mostly, informally or formally, structured around patriarchal gender lines, a woman can be called a slut for any number of reasons - not all of them having anything to do with her sexual activity. She is rarely called a slut admiringly. She is not given the same admiration, she has not the same coolth - again, I am talking about the application of the label, not her actual behaviours - as a man who, for instance, is a stud, or even a womaniser. We can reclaim the label - we can say, I am happy to dress this way, I am happy to have sex, I am happy to have sex with several people over the course of time - or at once. We can reclaim the label, be proud to be sluts. We can eschew the label - we can say, I am not promiscuous, my clothing, my drinking, my travelling alone, does not mean that I have sex at all or out of careful relationship bounds. But none of this is the central point of a Slutwalk. The central point is this: In a case of assault, the action was not invited. No one asks to be raped.You do not get to excuse the rapist by implying that the woman asked for it, or is at fault for it. The rapist, the assaulter, is the only person responsible for his (and in this sort of case, it is usually a man, and there is room for argument later about statistics and the like) crime, the harm he did.

To repeat: Don't blame the victim. Don't call them sluts and think that the rape, the assault, was bound to happen. Don't blame the victim, don't excuse and validate the assaulter.

In Toronto, women took to the streets, dressed varyingly, "normally", "provocatively", to make the statement that no one asks to be raped, no matter her attire; "Yes" is not merely the absence of "No", that clothing is a superficial message at best, and not about (or just about) a woman's willingness to have sex with anyone in general, or the men who approach her in particular.  They also organised open debates, workshops on gender sensitisation and the like, but the Walk was the Event, the centerpiece of the campaign. Their website is taking forever to load on my browser, but here is the link.  SlutWalk Toronto: BECAUSE WE'VE HAD ENOUGH.

Following the Toronto Slutwalk in April, there have been rallies around the world, with the campaigns spreading to Asia, and now India. Delhi had a walk at the end of July - have a look at the site for the Besharmi Morcha.

Quick and dirty arguments for a "Slut"Walk and against.

But! Now there are people who are hoping to organise a SlutWalk, and satellite activities, in Bangalore. This is the official Facebook Portal for the Bangalore SlutWalk.

The first meeting was yesterday, at ALF. There seemed to be three main initiators: Dhillan Mowli, our own Sowmya, and someone whose name (I am not sure, I am a horrible person!) is probably Shonali.

[Let's ignore all the arguments for and against the campaign having a man in the collective helm for now. Let's also ignore arguments of male privilege, how we don't need a man to validate our voices and choices. It's an argument for later, and a moot discussion until more has been accomplished. Or not.]

[So long as it's not ignored forever.]

Not much has been decided. DM had a truly excessive list of things we could do associated with the walk - plays, street plays, films, photography exhibitions, music events, school and campus outreach programmes, open panel discussions.

It was a fairly long discussion, and I am not going to go through it all. Here are some of the main points, and main decisions we did manage to reach:

  • we're going to avoid a narrative of victimisation. The Walk, and associated events, are to be about our voices and choices, about the appropriate taking and apportioning of responsibility. 
  • we need to figure out precisely what we are targeting: violence in public spheres, private spheres? Violence against women, children? 
  • the concepts of consent - the giving, the denying, the requesting of it. A large part of or concern as feminists, individualists and as human beings is to ensure that people can clearly say, No. Or Yes. Or "Would you?" As women we have the right, and as citizens and social beings we have the duty, to exercise these privileges. We don't, very often. We're raised, conditioned to be nice, to be polite, to not make scenes. But sometimes, it's necessary. Make a scene, darlings, raise your voices. Ask for what you want! Accept what you want that is offered! Give what you want to give! And say No - and let's work on making sure that that No is heard.
  • The school/campus outreach programmes. They need a lot of work, to be structured, to have people who know what the hell they're doing - and if they're not just limited to December, we need more manpower and more training and people with skills. This is not stuff to be trifled with just because we have good intentions.
  • The word "Slut" - is this what we want? Is it context appropriate? Moral policing in India works along different narratives and terminology, with the same final effect. We need to name our SlutWalk something that connects with us in our contexts, without losing sight of our basic goal. This means we want to try to keep it a bilingual campaign, too.
  • Communication, networking with the police and the media. Reminding ourselves and the public that we have instance-specific reasons in Bangalore and Karnataka (remember Mangalore and what started there. Remember the recent Darshan horrors.) to conduct a campaign that speaks out against victim blaming, moral policing and assaulter-excusing.
  • We want this campaign to be inclusive. We do not want a one day spectacle that can be dismissed as "upper-middle-class women dressing up because they want to be able to dress up" - though we want that too. We want all women to be safe on the streets, without fear that they will blamed for being assaulted - this means we need to network harder with people outside of the internet platforms that have informed us of the SlutWalks so far.
Of immediate concern:
  • DECEMBER 4th. We walk.
  • So much of what we need to do begins with figuring out what we want to do, what our specific aims and goals are. We want to be done with that in two weeks or less.
  • We meet again on MONDAY, OCTOBER 10TH, 5 pm at ALF.
That's it for now. There's a lot of work to be done, and a lot of principle to be negotiated. Contact Sowmya or the the Facebook SlutWalk Bangalore Portal for more information or to volunteer!