Bangalore Queer Pride 2012 schedule

website: http://bengalurupride.herokuapp.com/
email: blrpride@gmail.com

Contact us to volunteer, donate, or for more details!

Thursday, November 22

6:30pm

 Transgender Remembrance Day

When Thu, November 22, 6:30pm – 8:00pm
Where Town Hall

Description There will be a candlelight vigil to commemorate our lost and loved ones from the trans communities.
http://bengalurupride.herokuapp.com/?p=132

Friday, November 23

5:00pm

 TABOO photography exhibit launch

When Fri, November 23, 5pm – 6pm

Where No. 1 Shanthi Road, Shantinagar, Bangalore 560027 (map)

Description Six photography projects on the theme of TABOO - http://bengalurupride.herokuapp.com/?p=77

7:00pm

 Ek Madhav Baag (Hindi)

When  Fri, November 23, 7pm – 8pm

Where Jaaga, No 68, KH Double Road, Opposite Corporation Bank, Next to KH Road bus stand, Banglore 560027 (map)

Description This poignant play tells the story of a 21 year old youth coming to terms with his sexuality. The play is seen from the view point of his mother. http://bengalurupride.herokuapp.com/?p=137

Saturday, November 24

11:00am

 Garage Sale!

When Sat, November 24, 11am – 6pm

Where Alternative Law Forum, 122/4 Infantry Road (opposite Infantry Wedding House) Bangalore 560001 (nearest bus stop- Shivajinagar Depot) (map)

Description Reduce, reuse, recycle, and when all else fails, send it to your local fundraising garage sale for Bengaluru Pride and Karnataka Queer Habba 2012! http://bengalurupride.herokuapp.com/?p=127

Sunday, November 25

12:00pm

 Pride Mela at Jaaga

When Sun, November 25, 12pm – 7pm

Where Jaaga, No 68, KH Double Road, Opposite Corporation Bank, Next to KH Road bus stand, Banglore 560027 (map)

Description The Bangalore Queer Pride is proud to present to you the 2012 Pride Mela. This year we are coming back more colourful, louder and awesomer than ever! http://bengalurupride.herokuapp.com/?p=88

Monday, November 26
5:00pm

 Posters/Accessory Making Workshop at ALF

When Mon, November 26, 5pm – 7pm

Where Alternative Law Forum, 122/4 Infantry Road (opposite Infantry Wedding House) Bangalore 560001 (nearest bus stop- Shivajinagar Depot) (map)

Description Come to ALF to make posters and prideful accessories we can display during Bangalore Queer Pride March 2012!

Tuesday, November 27
6:00pm

 Theaters of the Body Workshop

When Tue, November 27, 6pm – 10pm

Where Jaaga, No 68, KH Double Road, Opposite Corporation Bank, Next to KH Road bus stand, Banglore 560027 (map)

Description Attend this theater workshop with Kareem Khubchandani. http://bengalurupride.herokuapp.com/?p=154

Wednesday, November 28

6:00pm

 Karnataka Police Act Panel Discussion and Performance

When Wed, November 28, 6pm – 8pm

Where Vishranti Nilayam, 18, CSI Womens House, Infantry Road, Infantry Road, (near The Hindu office) Bangalore, Karnataka 560001 (map)
Description We will dramatize the many oppressions faced by transgenders, and the additional oppression generated by KPA 36 (A), following which we will moderate a discussion with the audience on the way forward to combat this policy and the political system around us.
http://bengalurupride.herokuapp.com/?p=309

Thursday, November 29
7:00pm

 Posters/Accessory Making Workshop at Swabhava

When Thu, November 29, 7pm – 9pm

Where Swabhava, 4th Floor, M. S. Plaza, 13th “A” Cross, 4th Main, Sampangiramnagar, Bangalore 560027 (map)

DescriptionCome to the Swabhava center and help make posters we can carry and display during Pride March 2012!

Friday, November 30
6:00pm

 Biryani

When Fri, November 30, 6pm – 7pm

Where No. 1 Shanthi Road, Shantinagar, Bangalore 560027 (map)

Description Performance piece by our mangalamukhi sister, where she prepares delicious Biryani while engaging the audience with a monologue about life as a transgender. Join us for this multi-sensory performance piece.
http://bengalurupride.herokuapp.com/?p=311

7:30pm

 Diversity Kooth Night!

When Fri, November 30, 7:30pm – 11:30pm

Where Tango Calypso restaurants, # 44, Richmond Road, Bangalore, India 560025 (map)

Description Entry fee + Cover charge = Rs 150 + Rs 150 (profits will go towards the Bengaluru Pride 2012 fund)
http://bengalurupride.herokuapp.com/?p=258

Saturday, December 1
5:00pm

 Queer Words at Atta Galatta

When Sat, December 1, 5pm – 8pm

Where Atta Galatta, 75, 2nd Main Rd, Koramangala 1st Block, Bangalore, 560096 (map)

Description We invite poets, comedians, singers, writers to share their work in this open–mic format.
http://bengalurupride.herokuapp.com/?p=31

7:30pm

 Lavender Nights V

When Sat, December 1, 7:30pm – 11:30pm

Where Fireflies (Lavelle Road and Vital Mallya Road Junction, above Cafe Coffee Day) (map)

Description Lavender Nights is going to rock Bangalore once again with its FIFTH All Women Party at FIREFLIES, one of the most lovely venues in Bangalore, with a great central location for everyone’s convenience.
 http://bengalurupride.herokuapp.com/?p=265

Sunday, December 2

2:00pm

 Bengaluru Queer Pride March!

When Sun, December 2, 2pm – 5pm

Where Tulsi Park to Town Hall. Wear your walking boots!  (map)

Description Come march with us!
http://bengalurupride.herokuapp.com/?p=5

Queer Reads Bangalore: 1st meeting postponed!

So - we  are now meeting on the 11th of November, at 4 pm. I suggest Swabhava for our first meet, and after that we can shift venues to other places we can choose. 4 to 6 pm.

 

QUEER READS BANGALORE is a reading group, open to anyone, everyone, age, gender, race, orientation, class, caste no bar - and we shall focus on novels, shorts, novellas, plays, poems - all that is written, and written in the creative sphere - that are concerned with Queer and Questioning, Unidentified, Intersexed, Lesbian, Transgender and Transsexual, Bisexual, Asexual, Gay and Genderqeer themes, people, communities and issues - no matter the orientation of the person who wrote them. On the other side of the coin, we shall read literature by Queer and Questioning, Unidentified, Intersexed, Lesbian, Transgender and Transsexual, Bisexual, Asexual, Gay and Genderqeer writers irrespective of how non-heteronormative their literature may seem on the surface.

Think QUILTBAG literature. :)



To read:

THE PREGNANT KING is written by Devdutt Pattanaik. You can find it on Flipkart.

We're still feeling our way through this, but come, bring friends. Come if you love the book, HATE the book, didn't understand the book - disagreement is good, complete harmony is good, everything but you not saying anything is good.

From Devdutt Pattanaik's website

"The Hindu epic, Mahabharata, written over 2000 years ago, narrates the tale of one Yuvanashva, a childless king, who accidentally drinks the magic potion meant to make his queens pregnant. The child thus conceived in and delivered from his body grows up to be Mandhata, a ruler of great repute.

What does the son call Yuvanashva? Father or mother? Can mothers be kings? Can kings be mothers? In the ancient epic, and the sacred chronicles known as the Puranas, which hurry through this slip of a tale, nobody raises these uncomfortable questions. They do so in this book.

And so a new narrative emerges: a fiction fashioned out of mythological and imaginary tales where lines are blurred between men and women, sons and daughters, husbands and wives, fathers and mothers.

There is Pruthalashva, who must be father because he is a man, and Shilavati, who cannot be king because she is a woman. There is Sthunakarna, a Yaksha, who forsakes his manhood to make Shikhandi a husband and then reclaims it to make Somavat a wife. There is Arjuna, a great warrior with many wives, who is forced to masquerade as a woman after being castrated by a nymph. There is Ileshwar Mahadev, god on full moon days and goddess of new moon nights and Adi-Natha, the teacher of teachers, worshipped as a hermit by Yaja and an enchantress by Upayaja. And finally there is Yuvanashva, the hero, king of Vallabhi, who after marrying three times to three very different women, creates a life within him, as mothers do, and then a life outside him, as fathers do, and wonders if he is either, neither or both.

If biology is destiny, if gender is a cornerstone of dharma, then how does Yuvanashva make room for such disruptions in order? For a good king, who wants to be great, must be fair to all: those here, those there and all those in between."

Queer Reads Bangalore: first meeting: THE PREGNANT KING by Devdutt Pattanaik

QUEER READS BANGALORE is a reading group, open to anyone, everyone, age, gender, race, orientation, class, caste no bar - and we shall focus on novels, shorts, novellas, plays, poems - all that is written, and written in the creative sphere - that are concerned with Queer and Questioning, Unidentified, Intersexed, Lesbian, Transgender and Transsexual, Bisexual, Asexual, Gay and Genderqeer themes, people, communities and issues - no matter the orientation of the person who wrote them. On the other side of the coin, we shall read literature by Queer and Questioning, Unidentified, Intersexed, Lesbian, Transgender and Transsexual, Bisexual, Asexual, Gay and Genderqeer writers irrespective of how non-heteronormative their literature may seem on the surface.

Think QUILTBAG literature. :)

So - we meet on the 4th of November, at 4 pm. I suggest Swabhava for our first meet, and after that we can shift venues to other places we can choose. 4 to 6 pm.


To read:

THE PREGNANT KING is written by Devdutt Pattanaik. You can find it on Flipkart.

We're still feeling our way through this, but come, bring friends. Come if you love the book, HATE the book, didn't understand the book - disagreement is good, complete harmony is good, everything but you not saying anything is good.

From Devdutt Pattanaik's website

"The Hindu epic, Mahabharata, written over 2000 years ago, narrates the tale of one Yuvanashva, a childless king, who accidentally drinks the magic potion meant to make his queens pregnant. The child thus conceived in and delivered from his body grows up to be Mandhata, a ruler of great repute.

What does the son call Yuvanashva? Father or mother? Can mothers be kings? Can kings be mothers? In the ancient epic, and the sacred chronicles known as the Puranas, which hurry through this slip of a tale, nobody raises these uncomfortable questions. They do so in this book.

And so a new narrative emerges: a fiction fashioned out of mythological and imaginary tales where lines are blurred between men and women, sons and daughters, husbands and wives, fathers and mothers.

There is Pruthalashva, who must be father because he is a man, and Shilavati, who cannot be king because she is a woman. There is Sthunakarna, a Yaksha, who forsakes his manhood to make Shikhandi a husband and then reclaims it to make Somavat a wife. There is Arjuna, a great warrior with many wives, who is forced to masquerade as a woman after being castrated by a nymph. There is Ileshwar Mahadev, god on full moon days and goddess of new moon nights and Adi-Natha, the teacher of teachers, worshipped as a hermit by Yaja and an enchantress by Upayaja. And finally there is Yuvanashva, the hero, king of Vallabhi, who after marrying three times to three very different women, creates a life within him, as mothers do, and then a life outside him, as fathers do, and wonders if he is either, neither or both.

If biology is destiny, if gender is a cornerstone of dharma, then how does Yuvanashva make room for such disruptions in order? For a good king, who wants to be great, must be fair to all: those here, those there and all those in between."

Watch this space!

So many things to talk about, but I'm keeping a zipped lip until Sunday. Watch this space Sunday evening, and look out for us in DNA Bangalore!

In the meantime:

Bangalore Queer Pride is still coming up, and we still needs ze moolah to do all the fab things we want to do for you. And so, please look at this pig. Isn't she still the most adorable pig in the world? How can you not want to give her stuff?

You might also want to participate/contribute/save time for specific events.
We're having:
The TRANSGENDER DAY OF REMEMBRANCE!
The GARAGE SALE!
A MELA!
Three PANEL DISCUSSIONS!
A huge, huge, multi-project PHOTO EXHIBIT!
A week of THEATRE!
A LITERARY DAY (for both English and Kannada readers and writers!)
And of course: the QUEER PRIDE MARCH, so get your walking glad rags ready!

I am out of exclamation points, my darlings. 

BANGALURU PRIDE AND KARNATAKA QUEER HABBA - donations very, very welcome

SILENCE IS VIOLENCE - against apathy

Link to event page on FB In lieu of the recent cases and cases we have been hearing forever and after, of incidents of violence against women, a few of us have decided to come together to raise our voices. Express dissent. For how can you not see the evil, hear it, speak of it when it exists all around you? How can there so much apathy when Pinki Pramanik was humiliated? How can you raise again and again questions of character of the victim when a minor gets assaulted on the streets of Guwahati by 20 men, all who's faces we have seen on Facebook but the police have been unable to reprimand? We have decided to show our dissent on a working day, working for office goers, homemakers, freelancers, all of us in various roles. We will drop everything we are doing at 10 am and head for the venue to reach it by 11 am in the middle of the week on 26th July, a Thursday. We think enough is enough and this one day we refuse to contribute - to productivity in our offices, to the food larder at homes, to our clients or our children. So, we will leave our 'work' and go to the venue to spend time with each other, sharing, sloganing, singing, telling stories, teaching each other what we know, learning from each other what we don't. And then from all of us in Bangalore we will write a note to the police in Assam to take action on the attackers of the victim of the Guwahati incident. We will sign our demand - not an appeal or a petition and send it. How long can they remain silent if women from every city, town and village do the same? How long? And if nothing happens still, we will do this again. And again. Let us gather as women, as men who understand, as citizens, as humans, to show that even SILENCE IS VIOLENCE. Raise our voices. Be heard! Organisations Joining hands for Silence is Violence: Citizens Against Violence Ridhdhi Vimochana rAFIKI (Waiting for more) PLEASE BRING YOUR OWN PLACARDS: How to make a placard: Get some old cardboard box and flatten it to cut out the size of placard you want. Stick chart paper on it. Write/ paint the slogan/ pics you want on it in any language. make it large so people at least 15 feet away can read it. Make two holes on the top two corners with eyelets. Tie a string and hang it around your neck. Date: 26th July 20122 Time: 11 am venue: Town hall, Bangalore Organised by  By Neelima Prasanna Aryan, Srimatha Ramanand and Arundhati Ghosh. I think this is a great idea, and a good first step to take - I hope to see some of you there.

Story of a modern disease.

You are going to read about a girl. Can we address her as ‘she’? Oh yes, I think you can.

Call her ‘ she’ or actually, call her whatever you want, she just want to know that you are listening.

She likes feeling good, just like you do, but sometimes it’s impossible. She still manages somehow. She will love you a lot but that can’t evade a major problem she has. She is suffering from a bizarre disease and has been picked on for it, ever since she spilled into her mother’s womb.

She likes to be herself.

Disgusting, right? She has been told that.

Wherever she goes, she bares herself. She talks she like would, she spews out thoughts in cups, she lets her tongue wring on papers, she wants her mother to see her disease. You should understand how disappointed her parents are with this deformity. Clearly, she has no morals or sensibility to understand them. She is outrageous and has dared to love too. A man. A strange man. Skank, did that too.

Loving, desiring someone while being ‘yourself’, she is in a desperate need of therapy. You must agree. So on a sunny day, her parents took her to a hospital to remove that ‘yourself’. People in her family thought that she stank of ‘yourself’. She started hiding it in longer shirts and drab shoes, people say it would help her become better but still, how sad, ‘yourself’ sprung over her face like fire.

Worse, she stopped hiding it.

It had a distinct smell that her house hated, people questioned and only a very few people, captured it in tiny bottles to store in their heads. Doctors frisked her pants for the cause of her ailment. She writhed on the stretcher.

It leaks through the skin like puss, her mother thinks. Being ‘yourself’ is the worst thing a good child should do. It's mortifying, Oxford dictionary can add-flabbergasting, blasphemous, horrendous. It's so fucking obvious and why can't she choose something better? Earn money and let this down die down. Walk freely on streets and let this die down.

She is still ‘yourself’ after countless storms in hospital rooms, therapy rooms, family rooms, rape rooms, doomed rooms, class rooms, temple rooms, roomless rooms and she has to be helped.

If you have any constructive feedbacks or numbers of helpful doctors, please inbox her parents.

They will acknowledge your effort.

(Want more of this- Winks, poems, whispers and doodles like the one of top? Come over at, sootahwords.blogspot.in)

Karnataka Police Acts criminalises the hijra community

Reposting here with permission. The matter in question is the amendment of the Karnataka Police Act, with provisions (lifted from Acts set down by the British a century ago) that criminalise the hijra community. The Amendments have been passed, and the last CSMR meeting was held to address the new concerns raised.

Dear All

Here are the brief minutes of yesterday's CSMR meeting on the Karnataka Police Act: (next meeting on Wednesday, 25th July at 6pm)

There were around 20 people present including individuals representing from Aneka, Sangama, Karnataka Sexual Minorities Forum, PUCL (Karnataka), Lawyers Collective and ALF

The Amendments to the Police Act have been passed despite our efforts last year petitioning the government, and the Governor. These amendments are very dangerous and need to be struck off the statute book, we cannot depend on the government's assurance on whether they will use these laws or not. The law specifies that hijras who kidnap children, indulge in unnatural offences, and offences of this nature will be listed in a register, and this register can be used to summon those listed. This is based on the model of the Criminal Tribes Act that has been repealed.

The consensus from those present was that we need to work towards more awareness about these amendments within the LGBT/sexual minority community, and that we need to respond to the law at parallel levels -- talking to government officials, protests, media advocacy, and preparing for a possible challenge in court.

The first step will be a public meeting that we have planned where we will invite representatives of the BJP, Congress and JD(S), including the Law Minister Mr Suresh Kumar. The date we will suggest to the Minister is August 1st. We will finalise the date depending on his availability. We will also invite Motamma/Manjula Naidu from the Congress, Ramesh Babu/Narayanswamy from the JD(S) and the singer and Member of Parliament B. Jayashree as the Chief Guest. We will finalise a moderator and one person from the hijra and jogappa community to speak at this event. BT Venkatesh and Arvind Narrain will speak about the legal aspects of the amendments.

The suggested venues were NGO Hall and Rotary Club, depending on availability

We will also organise a Press Conference on the day before the meeting

We also discussed the possibility of getting an MLA to ask a question on this issue during zero hour in the Assembly session

Arvind and Siddharth from ALF  will work on a pamphlet that will be translated into Kannada (Sangama to do this)  and Tamil (Niruj will be requested to translate) - this pamphlet can be distributed to the LGBT community and also during the events we organise.

There will be a follow up meeting next Wednesday on 25th July at ALF at 6 pm to finalise the date and details related to the public meeting, Please do try and make it for this meeting since we need to mobilise as much support as possible to put pressure on the government to repeal this black law.


In solidarity

Siddharth

Write for Sanghamitra!

Hi Friends, we're trying to organize the next issue of Good As You's magazine, Sanghamitra (http://www.goodasyou.in/sanghamitra). Like the last two years, we intend to release the 2012 edition on (or around) 2nd July, so we're already a bit late in sending out this request for submissions.

Please send us LGBT-related original work, particularly in the following categories:
Creative/Fiction:
- Short/Long Story
- Poetry
- Erotica
- Art Submissions/Photos
- Jokes & Factual Tidbits

Features/Personal Experiences:
- Stories of good dates, bad dates, relationships, humourous anecdotes, other personal experiences
- Stories/accounts from straight friends/relatives/parents/siblings
- Coming Out Story
- Inspiration Page (Something/someone that has inspired you to come to better terms with yourself and your sexuality)
- In Memoriam (Tributes you may want to pay to a friend/lover that you lost)
- Gripes/Rants (Any issue that you take objection to and would like to vent about)
- Relationship Profile (You can choose to be interviewed for this, you don't have to write it yourself. Discretion will be exercised per your wishes.)
- A writeup on issues of particular interest to bisexual people
- General LGBT-Interest articles
- Opinions on any queer related issues
- Feedback/suggestions about our previous issue(s)

If there is anything else that you think might interest the readers of Sanghamitra, please do feel free to submit it, we are open to looking at anything publish-worthy.
Please send your submissions to <editors.sanghamitra@gmail.com> BEFORE 31 MAY.

Please help make Sanghamitra YOUR magazine, expressing YOUR voices, addressing YOUR issues.

Looking forward to your submissions.
The Sanghamitra Editorial Team

Volunteer for the Bangalore Queer Film Festival 2012!

http://blrqueerfilmfest.com/

Volunteer at the BQFF 2012

You can help the Bangalore Queer Film Festival 2012 by volunteering. There are plenty of opportunities and many tasks that need to be done. Contact us as soon as possible after going through the tasks and filling up the application form.

Volunteer Teams and Tasks

Please go through the list of Volunteer Teams that are going to be needed and choose which one you feel interested in and committed to.

Volunteer Application Form

Please fill up the VOLUNTEER APPLICATION FORM and send it by email addressed to Ms. Rohini Malur, here.

What To Do in Case of Homophobic Abuse

Hey everyone,

After a recent incident of homophobic abuse, in fact it happened on the pride night (i know..how sad and ironic). Emanuel and I wrote up this guide. Let us know if there are any additions that can be made.

Please read it and take something useful from it. Thanks again for all the inspiration!

-----------------------

What To Do in Case of Homophobic Abuse


1. What is Homophobic abuse?
Homophobic abuse can range from name-calling, discriminatory language, taunting, to physical alternations, violence, throwing of objects, and the list goes on. Any kind of willfully discriminatory action towards one or more LGBT persons can be considered homophobic abuse.

2. Where it can happen?
Anywhere. Homophobic abuse can happen in the most gay friendly neighborhood and in the least. Reports of homophobic abuse have been made in areas as public as Church Street and Times Square but can also happen just outside your doorstep, at school, or at work.

While homophobic abuse can happen anywhere it is important to not live your life in fear. Know what to do if you encounter a situation of abuse and empower yourself to stay smart when it happens.

3. What is legal?
Being LGBT is legal in India. Intimidation, blackmailing, and assault are illegal. Know your rights. No one in India can be “caught” for being gay. If someone threatens to reveal your identity or take you to the police it is important for you to call them on their bluff. Tell them that you will gladly go to the police and report them for intimidation, assault, and blackmail. If they do end up bringing you to the police they will be the ones in trouble. Again, being gay is not a crime.

4. What to do if you are in this situation?

If you find yourself in a situation of homophobic abuse, here are some tips:

A. Stay calm
Keep a cool head throughout. This will help you think clearly about what you should and the best steps to take. Staying calm does not mean not reacting or responding, but it is important to not freak out. Abusers pray on fear so, even if you are terrified, don’t give the abuser the satisfaction of knowing it.

B. Be Proud and Be Smart
Proud:
If someone is calling you abusive names, telling you that you are disgusting or perverted, you can choose to ignore them and not give them the time of day or you can ask them why they are filled with so much hate. No matter how you respond, realized that you have a lot of to be proud of and that no one can take that away.

If someone says you are a filthy gay, you might think of saying: “I am gay and proud of it.” Or “ I am proud to be gay – if you have a problem with it, keep it to yourself.”

Smart:
Being smart means knowing how to judge a situation. If the abuser wants to get physical - by pushing you, throwing things at you, or the like - you need to be smart about how you react. If you feel as though you are capable of defending yourself and need to defend yourself than that is one choice of action, but if you are outnumbered, alone, or don’t feel comfortable defending yourself by responding physically then report to the nearest responsible adult and/or safe place immediately. If this is occurring inside a restaurant, bar, or residential area – alert the manager, bar owner, or look for a nearby safety zone immediately. Don’t wait.
Please also see the emergency numbers section just below.

C. Call emergency numbers.
Have these important emergency numbers stored in your phone and on quick dial and make sure to call them immediately when the abuse starts. There is no such thing as being too careful or too responsive to homophobic abuse. The worse that can happen is you get some back up in the case the situation does worsen and a little moral support in case in doesn’t. The people on the other side of these phone lines are there to help. They want to be there and they want to help you.

Even if the incident is over and the abusers have left, you can give these numbers a call to report what happened.

Sangama runs 24/7 crisis hotlines. If you are ever in trouble, call them. They will help you ASAP
+91 994 560 1651 / +91 994 560 1652
+91 994 560 1653 / +91 994 560 1654
+91 994 523 1493
The Alternative Law Forum
+91 80 2286 5757 / +91 80 2286 8757
Good As You/Swabhava
+91 80 2223 0959
Lawyers Collective Bangalore
+91 80 4123 9130 / +91 80 4123 9131

D. Report the incident

One of the biggest obstacles in fighting homophobic abuse is a lack of data. Without enough hard data and statistics it becomes hard to implement policies that will make our cities and our lives safer. Policies such as sensitizing and training police, implementing extra watches around certain problem areas, and even the changing of laws to be stricter when punishing those who commit these crimes, are all potential results of increased reporting.

There are many ways to report an incident anonymously. One can file an anonymous report at a police station, get a friend to do the same, leave an anonymous tip on a police phone line, or send in a letter or email.

In you have chosen to report the incident to the necessary authorities it may also be a good idea to bring up the situation to peer support groups in your area. There are a variety of support groups throughout India that provide safe spaces for LGBT people to talk about incidences of abuse. In Bangalore, the Thursday night Good As You meetings continue to provide a forum for individuals to share their stories, seek solidarity and advise, and inform fellow community members.

While it can be very frightening to report or to talk about incidences of homophobic abuse, this is one of the best ways in which to use your experience as a force for positive change. Our power is that we are in the midst of a worldwide civil rights movement and the world is listening. These issues are being talked about in meeting rooms, offices, and coffeehouses around the globe and incidents such as this add needed real-life examples to that conversation. If everyone kept their experiences a secret it is almost assured that nothing would change – but if we share then we have the ability to empower others and gain perspective ourselves.

5. Some quotes from people

“When I was in my final year in law school…these people…broke into my room and found these books that my boyfriend had gifted me and just kind of tore them up and scribbled…fag on the cover and obviously broke the lock open for that. If you are in an institutional set up than I would say approaching the authorities is a great idea. In other circumstances, anyone who bullies and an anyone who is homophobic does not deserve your time and patience…I would say contact your local NGO person, whoever they may be – they’re always very helpful here. For instance I did talk to people at ALF when that happened and you know, they were of some use to help give me advice for things.” Sundeep

“Two years ago I was stalked by a man instead a car. It was quite late -11 PM. At 11 I went out [and] started walking and I could feel something, you know? It’s creepy. It’s scary. It’s dark outside – no one’s around so there was a neighbor cigarette shop and people there knew me well so I stopped there, I started smoking a cigarette and the car stopped right there. I still had a kilometer to walk. I decided I am not going to look the person in the eyes and I just kept walking and walking walking and I made it to my home.” Saeed

“Another time, back then, in 2004, I had just started meeting people. I met this guy. One morning my mom told me that a friend of you wants to speak to you. I heard a random unfamiliar voice on the phone saying, ‘I heard that you were hot in bed. Meet me tomorrow at 5 PM.’ That you have to come, you have no option. That was hilarious I replied, ‘If I decline what are you gonna do?’ He said ‘I’m going” to speak to your mom and I’m going to tell her what you are doing around in this town.’ I said ‘good luck’ I slammed the phone. Nothing happened.” Saeed

“My BF & I checked into a hotel in Chennai for a night in 2009 (after decriminalization of Homosexuality in India). He lives in Mumbai & had came out to his parents that day (which went disastrously). He rushed to Chennai to be with me. We had to stay in a hotel because I lived with my parents & didn't have enough privacy.

When we checked out the next day, guys at the front desk made some nasty comments (behind us). And also asked persistently why we were staying in a room when we live in Chennai (I had given my address during check-in. They didn't have any problems letting us stay & wanted the business.)

For the next few weeks, I got harassing calls at my residence. The guy who called spoke to whoever picked the phone & said thing like " I am Mohan's wife speaking", "May I speak to Mohan madam" (referring me as a female), "Mohan sir indha vaaram entha hotel, enna rate?" (Which hotel is Mohan staying this week? what is his rate?) etc..

My parents were very upset. I am out to them, so I explained what happened & asked them to ignore the calls. I didn't pursue this with the hotel.” “It took every ounce of my energy and will to write this mail without being overtly emotional though the entire experience was an eruption of emotions. Mohan

Never in million years would anyone of us have thought that our regular weekend pub hopping would end up in such disheartening and humiliating experience. Being able to glide through in and out of the lounges and bars for many years we never would have imagined that something like this will happen to us. Assuming being well educated and being in the cream layers of the society will make things easier for queer men was shattered.

What can be merrier and joyous than being with bunch of gay men who could just see everything on a lighter note??? That was the state of mind we were in when we started out on 23rd October Sunday evening. As we were getting ready we got a call from couple of our friends who were already in a bar (The Zodiac bar at The Accord Metropolitan) to come and join them. Since this is one of the bar we have frequented we went inside and after the usual greetings and hugs couple of us placed the orders and others started looking through the menu One of us was carrying a man bag and the waiter sort of whispered to the bartender pointing him. When our friend asked the bartender about our order he didn’t answer. The manager I presume told him that there is no service for our group and we are not allowed and asked him to leave the bar.

Since he couldn’t talk Tamil and the manager couldn’t respond well in English, we, who were busy going through menu sensed something was wrong as our friend started looking perplexed.

The entire scene unfolded in the lounge outside the bar when we asked why there is no service. One of the service guys said they allow only men and women. We were shocked by this response. It was a blow to our pride and we were completely taken aback.

Incredulous as it sounded one of us asked him again what he is trying to say, he said that “men and women only sir, gays lam allowed illa”. We shot back that there is no such rules listed in entrance and we have every right to be there and they are unreasonable denying service. Then came another guy who started talking in Tamil said “ungala ulla vidradellam asingam. Kelambu kelambu” (it’s a shame for us to let u inside. Move move).

We were addressing him with respect till then and he started addressing us in a disrespectful way, tone and body language.The argument got heated and we asked them if they have any rules against letting gay men in the bar and if so they should put that in sign board and or give it to us in writing stating so. When we were inquiring on the regulations this guy became abusive and told “naalu aalungala kooptu thorathunga ivangala” (Bring four guys and chase them away).
We were so shocked and stunned by the way the management was handling and we demanded we spoke to their higher authority stating that’s they aren’t managing the issue well. He said that “adhellam mudiyaadu. Ungalukku yellarayum kooduvaangala”. (We can’t call authorities and all).

Though I had every intention of making a protest in the lounge we realized that we could do nothing about it and decided to leave the place before things got uglier.
The entire experience was so humiliating, though we all stood up against the discrimination, it dint fail to leave a deep rooted scar. I couldn’t imagine how worse the same would have been if we weren’t a bunch. When I look back at this entire scenario, I realized how feeble legal and social support is towards the queers.

Though we couldn’t do much on the issue, sharing it in this space might make us realize that we don’t have to put up with everything. At the least we could voice our protest.” Manohar

All names mentioned above in the incidents have been changed